Social Experiments

I've been very interested lately in conducting some highly specialized social experiments. I'm not sure if this is out of a need to engage my brain in some form of research or out of complete and utter (I almost just wrote udder) boredom, but whatever it is, it's rather fun.

It all started because I don't have a particular style to which I ascribe. One day I will wear jeans and a t-shirt, one day I will look like a hippie. I embrace my love for Colorado with a fleece and chacos, or I embrace my Missouri roots with an old school Chiefs (go Chiefs!) sweatshirt and some sweatpants. I've always wanted to learn how to look like a Hipster, but I'm still not quite sure what that means. My friend Kim tells me that to dress like a Hipster you have to wear all of your clothes and accessories at once. I think she's right.

Anyway, I work at a little coffee shop here in Denver and therefore see a whole lot of people each day. We don't have a uniform, so I wear whatever suits my fancy that day (or actually, I pick out my clothes the night before like a good little girl. partly because I'm anal and my closet is color coordinated, and partly because I really like getting up at the last possible second when I have to be at work by 5am). While at work, I began noticing a pattern. And the pattern was that people on a fairly frequent basis would comment on my clothing or hair style of the day. Mostly these people were my regulars, and mostly they were men. Older men. Married older men. Huh. I find this a bit confusing and more than a little creepy. My boss tells me that it's because married men are taught to notice details about their wives, and therefore notice things about their barista as well. Maybe. My friend tells me it's because they can't think of anything else to talk about and they don't want to just give me the normal "how are you today?" because that gets boring and cliche after a while, so they move on to a topic that is more in depth, but still not getting personal. Ok. I can believe that one.

Deciding to turn this strange phenomenon into a game, I started a tally system. I wore a crazy headband rambo style and donned my funkiest pair of hippie jeans and headed to work with a new passion: to prove that I wasn't crazy; that old men really did comment on my outfit more than is necessarily comfortable. And to throw in a control group I added a tally column for women too. It was neck and neck all day, but eventually after 6 hours and 13 comments the men had it by a hair. 7 to 6: men to women. I wasn't crazy, but I was at least a little comforted that women were commenting too.

Having success in this experiment, I eagerly looked for new opportunities to entertain me. I even went so far as to ask the front desk man at my financial adviser's office if he ever conducted social experiments to see where people sat down when they entered the office (I think this made him very confused. apparently he doesn't entertain himself the way I do). You see, there are four chairs. Each perfectly arranged in a square so that you either have to sit uncomfortably close to someone or directly opposite them. Both are equally awkward. Believe me, there was a man sitting there when I arrived and I had to choose between the seat next to him (that felt a little too intimate) or the seat right across from him where I was guaranteed to either have to stare at the table in front of me the whole time or risk several instances of awkward accidental eye contact. He looked nervous and was dressed in a very nice suit. And so I amused myself with the thought of asking him if he was there for an interview and then telling him I was there for one too. And then laugh inwardly as he appraised my appearance (it was a t-shirt and chacos day). I would have said "oh man, maybe I should have dressed up more!. And then I would have kept an excellently straight face. Just to see what he would do. (yet another social experiment).

My financial planner saved me from the awkwardness and as we went back to his office, he told me that you could always tell someone was there for an interview because they were either reading the paper or looking at their phone. Apparently he likes social experiments too. And this guy was doing both, so his hypothesis proves true...at least in this instance.

Anyway, this has been long. We are now going to conduct a social experiment to see who made it this far. And the way we're going to do that is by looking at the stats of how many page visits this blog gets and how many page visits MY NEW WEBSITE gets. So click on it. Please! Google needs to start recognizing that it exists so that pregnant mamas can find me! Ok go!